Five items from Oracle of Seasons that come up in a murder investigation.
Goron Vase: The fine details present in the Goron Vase’s surface imply that the Biggoron was not the potter responsible for its creation. The Biggoron gives Link the vase in exchange for the lava soup that cured his cold.
The murder weapon, if you can call it that, was a tea kettle with a secret compartment filled with poison. This devious kettle keeps the poisoned tea in a separate compartment that only pours when the kettle is held in a particular but innocuous way. The killer probably drank a cup of tea with the victim, disarming any fear of foul play.
Fish: Ingo, the vase collector has been after a Goron Vase for years but the Biggoron refused to give him the vase at any price. When Link brings the vase to Ingo’s home in the sunken city, Ingo demands the nearly priceless vase and offers to compensate Link with a nameless fish. He probably just went out to the edge of his property and caught the fish from the lake that is Sunken City.
The poison used in the tea kettle was like nothing I had ever seen before. I eventually tracked it down to being the mucus of a deep-sea fish that was thought to be as old as the dinosaurs. Exposure to the mucus causes the victim’s lung to fill with fluid and an almost gill-shaped rash to form on the neck.
Megaphone: On the shores of Eyeglass Lake there is an Old Man whose cat is stuck up a tree. His first method for getting the cat down was to yell at the poor creature as loudly as possible through a megaphone. Unsurprisingly that did not work to lure the cat down. When the Old Man sees Link has a juicy fish, he trades his megaphone for Link’s fish. The fish is just the thing the cat was holding out for.
The victim was found face down in the gutter on the side of the road. We had to have extra help brought in to break up the crowd. Megaphones and barricades just made the whole crime scene more interesting to all the rubber-neckers passing by.
Mushroom: In Link’s ascent of Mt. Cucco he stumbles across a sleeping man in a cave. If Link wakes Talon up by yelling through the megaphone into the deep sleeper’s ear he finds a very pleasant mountain climber who is shocked at how long they overslept. Hoping to avoid the problem in the future, Talon asks Link to trade the megaphone for a large mushroom that grows in the cave. Talon wants to be sure that the next time he oversleeps, anyone who finds him can wake him up.
Syrup the Witch needs such a mushroom to brew her famous potions, so that is where Link is headed next.
The facts of this case just don’t make sense. One of my contacts said I need to see past the world I think I know into the world that is. I don’t know what they meant, but I don’t think I should be eating this mushroom they gave either.
Wooden Bird: Taking the Mt. Cucco mushroom to Syrup at her potions shop in Sunken City, Link exchanges the fungus for a cleverly carved wooden bird. With a fresh mushroom, Syrup can again brew magic potions. The next time Link stops by the shop, and forever after, Syrup has magic potions for sale for a whopping 200 rupees each.
According to a letter that was anonymously sent to my office, this boring statue of a bird that I found in the victim’s apartment is actually some sort of lost treasure idol covered in clay to smuggle it into the country. Problem is, the statue has been pulling paperweight duty at my place and I’m all the way across town. If the author of the letter knows what the bird really is, who else does too?
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I hadn’t actually seen the Maltese Falcon until last year when I was procrastinating some work I had to do with a mid-day movie screening. Noir has never been my favorite genre, but I really enjoyed watching one of the classic hard-boiled detective movies.
If you are interested in watching it, the internet archive currently has the whole thing available for streaming.
Recent updates from the world of COVID have got me a bit surprised. With the guidance that fully vaccinated people in the U.S. can start transitioning back into their normal lives, I hope you all see the great benefit of getting vaccinated. My experience with the vaccine was having some strong side effects after the second dose and then having greater peace of mind knowing I was protected from dying and spreading the virus.
Don’t be one of the people who will just stop wearing masks but not actually be vaccinated. Do your part to help keep everyone safe and get the vaccine as soon as you are able.
Be excellent to everyone.
-Ceph
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