The Minish Cap: Susan’s last shot

 Susan’s last shot

Quiver: When Link gets the bow, he must get some sort of quiver as he can carry arrows. To upgrade how many arrows he can carry at once, he must find the three large quivers throughout the land to eventually hold 99 arrows. He can buy a quiver, earn a quiver through kinstone fusion, and receive one from a Great Fairy if he is wise enough.

Susan Pevensie was one of the great sovereigns of Narnia during its golden age. She was last seen in Narnia on the day of Prince Caspian’s reclamation of his throne, departing through the portal as a sign of good faith. Susan is never again welcomed into Narnia as she has been deemed unfriendly to Narnia by some unknowable and unimpressive rubric.

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Happy Mother’s Day here in the U.S.A. If you have a mother in your life, even if they aren’t technically your mother, send them some love today. If you don’t have someone you want to send warm thoughts to today, send yourself some love because something happened to you, and you deserve love and support.

Since you’re here, please consider donating:

Make a one-time donation with Ko-Fi:  https://ko-fi.com/theeasyspeaker

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Thank you for your support.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

The Minish Cap: Outlaw’s Bow

 Outlaw’s Bow

Bow: Link earns this Minish bow by defeating a group of monsters hiding in a Minish-sized cave in the Castor Wilds. The bow changes sizes when Link does so; he can use it shrunk or normal-sized. Like most Legend of Zelda bows, Link can use it to attack enemies from afar, flip switches, and strike distant, often eye-shaped, targets.

This outlaw never intended to be a famous hero fighting for the people against a tyrannical plutocracy. For many years, they lived a simple life deep in the woods where the plutarch’s laws couldn’t reach. Eventually, regular folk fleeing the endless squeeze of the wealth-obsessed monarch brought word of the small folks’ plight to the hooded outlaw, and they could not sit and do nothing while the powerless suffered.

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I’m currently reading The Once and Future King by T.H. White, which tells the story of King Arthur. I did not at all expect Robin Hood to show up. There are no more spoilers than that, but I’m excited to see what other oddities will be woven into the familiar tale. 

Since you’re here, please consider donating:

Make a one-time donation with Ko-Fi:  https://ko-fi.com/theeasyspeaker

Become a sustaining supporter on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ItemCardswithTheSpeakingSquid 

Thank you for your support.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Four Swords Adventures: A magical multishot bow.

 A magical multishot bow.

Bow: Like most items in the Four Swords games, the bow is a pedestal item that can only be used in the stage a Link picks it up. Link can use the bow to attack enemies from a safe distance or solve specific puzzles.

In lands where magical talent is as common as the breath in your chest, most learn to weave into their chosen trade. This bow was crafted for an arcane archer known for diving into the fray and fighting their way out. When charged with power the bow fires a wide volley of arrows, hopefully cutting a swathe of safety to retreat through.

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Drawing interesting but reasonable bows is quite tricky. All the fantasy game bows I looked at for reference are wildly over the top, I’m looking at you Blizzard. I tried to toe the line between a reasonable bow and an interesting bow. 

If you enjoy my work, please consider donating:

Make a one-time donation with Ko-Fi:  https://ko-fi.com/theeasyspeaker

Become a sustaining supporter on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ItemCardswithTheSpeakingSquid 

Thank you for your support.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Wind Waker: A Trebuchet that you can fit in your pocket?

 A Trebuchet that you can fit in your pocket?

Large Quiver: This second and final upgrade to Link’s quiver increases the amount of arrows he can carry to a towering 99. Link is given the upgrade by the Great Fairy that lives on Thorned Fairy Island. The entrance to the fairy’s home is blocked by thorny vines that Link can only clear using the Magic Hammer.

Want to stay out of trouble but still rain down terror? Pocket Siege’s Trebuchet is just the thing for you. This magically miniaturized trebuchet can be enlarged to its original size without needing to establish complex logistics and long baggage trains. With a Trebuchet from Pocket Siege, you can go from scouting the enemy’s defenses to firing your first barrage in as little as one hour.

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What else would you like to see from the industrious folks at Pocket Siege? Let me know what you’re hoping to see from them next.

Be excellent to each other.

-Ceph

Wind Waker: A catapult you can fit in your pocket!

A catapult you can fit in your pocket!

Big Quiver: This upgrade to Link’s original quiver allows him to carry up to 60 arrows at any time. Link is given the upgrade by the Great Fairy that lives on the Western Fairy Island. The entrance to the fairy’s sanctuary is blocked by a wall of fire that can only be cleared by using the Magic Hammer. 

The product that started it all here at Pocket Siege was the Pocket Catapult. This magicallly miniaturized catapult is easy to store and carry while in its diminutive state, and can be returned to its normal size by completing the conveniently included de-minitiarizarion ritual. Here at Pocket Siege we believe you should enjoy catapults where you need it, not just where logistics make it feasible!

Ammunition, crew, and reminiaturization ritual not included.

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Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Wind Waker: A tool for fighting night creatures from Wind Waker.

Wind Waker: A tool for fighting night creatures from Wind Waker.

Light Arrows: The light arrows are the final item Link obtains in his adventures, earning them in Gannon’s Tower by defeating an illusion of Phantom Gannon. The light arrows are a goddess-granted superweapon that can slay any normal enemy in a single shot and are the only thing that can weaken Gannon enough to be slain. Light arrows are vital in defeating Gannon. First Link uses them to defeat Gannon in various forms, and then Zelda takes up the bow and light arrows to work together with Link so that his evil can be sealed away.

Radiant arms were crafted in secret for the soldiers who knew the true enemy was not the English, but the vampiric shadow sovereign pulling the strings. The vampiric government sought to piggyback on the brutal colonialist expansions to spread their influence around the world. Armed with weapons imbued with the light of day, a small group of fighters seek to hold back the tide of darkness.

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Vampire colonists were done well in Magic the Gathering’s Ixalan expansions. While I do not play MtG at all these days, I do try to keep up with the lore.

Apropos of colonialist expansions, I wonder what a version of Jared Diamond’s Guns, Germs, and Steel would be like if magic existed or if the gods were active interventionists? Guns, Germs, Steel, and Sorcery. Gods, Guns, Germs, and Steel.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Wind Waker: A cold blooded murderer from Wind Waker.

 Wind Waker: A cold-blooded murderer from Wind Waker.

Ice Arrows: In Wind Waker, the ice arrows are given to Link at the same time as the fire arrows. The Fairy Queen gives these both to Link after he has rescued his sister Aryll from the Forsaken Fortress. Link must use the ice arrows to freeze a volcano and can use them to freeze enemies. This can be especially useful if he then shatters frozen enemies with the Skull Hammer. More on that later.

This supernaturally cold pistol was not intentionally enchanted. Instead, it gained icy powers siphoning the life force from the many innocent lives it snuffed out. It is ever hungry for more souls and slowly convinces any who own it to become cold calculating murders.

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This was actually the first item card I drew in the Wind Waker item set. It has some rough edges but I’m proud of it all things considered.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Wind Waker: A destructive blunderbuss from Wind Waker.

A destructive blunderbuss from Wind Waker.

Fire Arrows: Fire arrows are one of the three magical arrows Link can use as he sails the Great Sea. Fire arrows can be used to melt ice barriers, ignite flammable barriers, or burn enemies. He is given these arrows by the Fairy Queen after Link rescues his sister Aryll from the Forsaken Fortress. The Fairy Queen makes her home in the Mother and Child Islands. 

Most famous gunslingers are known for their pinpoint accuracy and nerves of steel. Not Scorched Earth Earle who earned fame for having the widest and most destructive shot in the west. They effectively signed their death warrant when their careless shooting took the hand and eye of one of those other gunslingers with pinpoint accuracy and nerves of steel.

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This begins a series of posts that are one gun with a bunch of different elemental enchantments. I’ve got a blunderbuss, pistol, rifle, and sniper coming out in the next few weeks.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Wind Waker: A heart-seeking bow from Wind Waker.

 A heart-seeking bow from Wind Waker.

Hero's Bow: In Wind Waker, Link earns the Hero’s Bow by proving himself a true hero in the Tower of the Gods. As the dungeon item for the Tower, Link gets to practice using the box to shoot targets that hold doors shut and distance switches that need flipping. In the hands of the hero, the bow is both a weapon for slaying evil and a tool for solving puzzles.

When you get offered a bow that is guaranteed to shoot an arrow through a heart when drawn, you should stop and think about the implications of such an enchantment. The careless and bloodthirsty among you would think it a boon, surely it will slay all my enemies unerringly. A more suspicious person might wonder what happens when you draw the bow with no other living being around for miles, who does the bow slay then?

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I can still improve a lot in drawing compelling bows. Bows in fantasy media are usually depicted as wildly interesting and hyper complicated curved statues that wouldn’t really work. Pre-modern bows are simple but effective things that inspired fear and awe not because they looked particularly fearsome, but because they could slay a person from hundreds of yards away. Modern pulley bows and Olympic shooting bows do look pretty wild, so I guess I should start looking to them for inspiration.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Skyrim 10th Anniversary: An arrow taken from the knee of a Skyrim guard.

 An arrow taken from the knee of a Skyrim guard.

Knee-seeking Arrow: Prior to becoming a member of the hold’s guard, this proud Nord used to be an adventurer just like you. That was before the cursed day when an errant shot from a bandit struck the adventurer in the knee. The lingering pain and stiffness from that arrow shot to the knee ended their adventuring career and forced them to take up a life of public service.

Day three of the Skyrim 10th anniversary celebration brings us a famous meme from the game. As a DM I rarely track mundane ammunition for my ranged players, but I am a big fan of single-use consumable ammunition that has bonus qualities. I’d imagine a knee-seeking arrow does reduced damage but applies a difficult-to-cure slow debuff on a successful hit.

I hope you are enjoying the selection of items. I was going to be able to say that I chose all non-weapon items, but of course, I had to do an arrow which threw the pacifism item set out the window.

On the third day of Skyrim,

tenth anniversary,

knee seeking arrows,

Golden Dragon Claw,

and a helmet of iron and horn.

See you tomorrow for some holy or heretical jewelry, depending on who you ask.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

Four Swords: An infamous bow from Four Swords.

An infamous bow from Four Swords.

Bow and Arrows: Like most items in Four Swords, the bow and arrows are only found on a pedestal in various levels and can only be used in the level they were found. The bow and arrow are mostly used for shooting otherwise inaccessible switches and attacking enemies from a safe distance.

Depending on who you ask, this bow is either the last best hope of a hopeless people or the tool of a heartless terrorist hell bent on destroying all that is good. No matter what you think of the bow’s mission, no one can deny its effectiveness. In the hands of an expert, the bow can shoot farther and straighter than any bow on the continent.

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Welcome to any of the new visitors to my humble blog. It has been exciting seeing new visitors and I hope you have found something that inspires you throughout my backlog. If you have an item you would like to see get my treatment, let me know and I will try to accommodate your request.

I also want to shamelessly plug myself for a moment. I opened up a Ko-fi where you can donate directly to me. If you have founds $1 or $3 or $5 or some value from all my images, please consider sending me a tip. I spend a lot of time creating these images and posts because I love to do it, but it doesn’t hurt when other people show their appreciation in tangible ways. 

For full disclosure, I have never really played The Witcher, but I did play through all of Witcher 2 and am currently working through Witcher 3. That means my experience and knowledge of Iorveth is somewhat limited. His bow is cool though, so I drew it. 

With crazy heat waves being punctuated with freak storms and fires, it is a great time to remind everyone that climate change is a real problem. One that will take every human working together to solve. Unfortunately, every human includes billionaires who would rather push the tourist industry into space than figure out how to make the planet habitable for all people forever.

Be excellent to everyone.

-Ceph

 

I'm not an artist: Six items from Majora’s Mask you can find in an archery competition.

Six items from Majora’s Mask you can find in an international archery competition.

Quiver: Our hero has to have a bow, and a bow uses arrows, and arrows have to go somewhere, so our hero has a quiver. The hero’s literally named bow comes with its own quiver that can hold thirty arrows.

A boastful and inebriated monarch claimed that, in their service, was the finest archer in all the lands. They were so confident in their archer’s abilities that they placed an apple on top of their head and ordered the archer shoot it through. With much hesitation, the archer knocked an arrow fletched with raven feather and shot the apple dead one. Without realizing it, they had also just birthed the annual Blackfeather Archery Competition.

I'm not an artist: The first six items from Majora’s Mask you could find in the Great Spell War.

The first six items from Majora’s Mask you could find in the Great Spell War.

Ocarina of Time: Link is given the Ocarina of Time by Zelda as he is leaving Hyrule in the prologue of Majora’s Mask. She also teaches him the Song of Time, warning him to play it in times of need. Link's ability to travel in time by playing the Song of Time is the only thing that allows the entire story of Majora’s Mask to take place. Without it, Skullkid would have succeeded in their apocalyptic plan of pulling the moon down from the sky. For continuity purposes, Majora's Mask takes place in the child Link timeline after he is successful in defeating Ganondorf.

Legends tell of a vast store of ancient arcano-technology held in a hidden vault behind a sealed gate that can only be opened after the fabled Horn of Doom is blown. A thousand years of peace were shattered when foolish adventurers sounded the ancient horn without knowing it would warn all the world that the vault would soon open. After the warning, the great powers of the world quickly mobilized their vast forces to ensure they would be the first to find and secure the vault.

I'm not an artist: Six items from Ocarina of Time two outlaws would carry.

Six items from Ocarina of Time two outlaws would carry.

Bomb Bag: Link obtains the bomb bag in Dodongo’s Cavern. With the bag, Link is no longer reliant on bomb flowers to solve puzzles and reveal secrets. This feels like the game begins to trusts you with the explosive mechanic enough to take you off the “see a bomb flower, expect to see a location to be bombed nearby” leash. 

I'm not an artist: Five items from Ocarina of Time you could see during ajourney to the shining temple.

Five items from Ocarina of Time you could see during journey to a shining temple.

Light Arrow: Link’s arrows are empowered with the goddesses’ light after he frees all seven sacred sages. The arrows allow Link to dispel magical barriers and strike lethal blows against Ganondorf. As an added bonus, monsters slain by light arrows almost always drop a bunch of rupees. Mechanically it is a nice way to provide the player more rupees in the endgame, but I also think that the hero of time being able to abuse the sacred power for personal gain is an interesting unspoken complication to the narrative.

From atop the temple of the triple goddess, a ceaseless light shines out onto the lands of the people. Even during the darkest night, the lands of the people are held in a twilight by the presence of the sacred light. The light shines from the crystal head of a spear that was once wielded by the greatest evil to ever rule over the people. The Hero of Song, the greatest of all the people’s heroes, defeated the great evil by securing three blessings from the three-that-are-one. Only after the hero received all three blessings were they able to defeat the great evil. Modern incarnations of the Hero’s Song tell that the hero slew the evil with their own spear and then triumphantly sang the three blessings into the once accursed weapon. Placing the newly hallowed spear atop the greatest temple on the highest rise so that its light might act as a ward against suffering for the people and their lands. The hero than left the lands of the people to pursue the corrupting force of evil in far off lands and have many great adventures. Recently rediscovered verses written down long ago say the hero defeated the great evil, but was reluctant to partake in the people’s revelry when they learned of the victory. The last act of the hero was to sing a mighty barrier around the spear's resting place that could withstand almost any force. The effort robbed the hero of their voice and led them to a life of solitude hidden away from the people.

I'm not an artist: Six items from Ocarina of Time you could find in a pulp hero story.

Six items from Ocarina of Time you could find in a pulp hero story. 

Bomb: Bombs only become available to Link once he obtains the bomb bag. After that, Link can blow open cracked walls, destroy weak stones, and give giant lizards heartburn as he sees fit. 

During the gala celebrating the newly unveiled Park City hazardous waste containment and neutralization center, a clockwork automaton crashes through the glass ceiling bringing the party to a standstill. The machine announces that the infamous Doc Clock has directed their minions to place bundles of dynamite all over the containment facility. If the waste stores at the plant were to be released, it would quickly wash down river and render the entirety of Park City unlivable for a generation. With the facility on the outskirts of town, no one is sure the bomb squad will make it in time.

I'm not an artist: Another month, another five items from The Legend of Zelda

Happy Easter Fools Day. Another five items from The Legend of Zelda drawn by me.

Magical Boomerang: The dot on the gem at the center was supposed to be a highlight. Now that I look at it after some time away, I sort of get a Cylon eye vibe. This boomerang could be intelligent or be controlled mentally like a RC drone. You could even use this as a sort of surveillance device that allows the user to look out from the perspective of the gem as it flies. 

I'm not an artist: A belated introduction and some more items from The Legend of Zelda

The point of the I'm not an artist series is to get myself to put things out into the world as I practice drawing. I am using this space to build good habits and create things for others after years of being a lurker.

Here are another five items from '84's The Legend of Zelda. 

White Sword: This is pretty much me drawing the version of the White Sword from Hyrule Warriors. This has a paladin's claymore feel. Sort of like Chrysamere or a Holy Avenger.